Today is my dad's birthday. He would have turn 75 is he's still here. And, I still miss him even though he's been gone for more than 11 years. I think when you loose a love one you will never stop missing them.
Many, many moments come and go where I thought, "Oh, how I wish he was here to see this or to experience this moment." I missed him at my wedding. Wished he could have met my hubby. Missed him when I went home for Christmas. Missed him at my brother's wedding. I wish he could see how his little girl finally grow up and do well. And, I wish my niece Shakira could have met him. He would so spoil her rotten.
So many memories comes through my mind as I typed this post. I have this picture framed and displayed in our living room. This was from Christmas eve 1994. It was the last time all of us together as complete family for the holidays. After that there's always one of us missing as we all have different things going on.
It took me over a year before I finally fully accepted he was gone. Because at that time of his passing I was already in the States that many time I felt like he was just away in Indonesia instead of really gone. During that first year, I could burst into tears at any time at random time. Now, I only cried when I feel melancholy or nostalgic. Like right now. You'd think after 11 years I won't cry anymore....
I like to think that he is up in heaven now playing with Oscar & Ceasar, his rottweilers and hopefully with Milo my pug that I lost back in 2004. I imagine he spend his time hanging out with his old friends and watching over us. To dad, wherever you are, I still think of you and miss you. Happy birthday, dad.
I know many of you come here for crafty projects, but for today, I want to take the time to share my thoughts and feeling about my dad.
I do have a card up on Paper Made Bakery blog. Here's the sneak peek of my card and you can see the full card at Paper Made Bakery.
Thank you for letting me share my personal story. Have a blessed day everyone.
8 comments:
I know how you feel as I have lost both parents, a Sister and a Son, and you never forget them there always in your thoughts and heart, and wish they were still here to share the good times and bad with you, it does get easier to cope with the idea, but the pain never goes away, God bless you and yours !!
love the card !!!
Paula
losing a loved one is never easy - I can sympathize, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family as you celebrate his life hold those memories dear.
Sandra
Vera, As you already know, I share that feeling of missing both of my parents still after 12 and 11 years. I know what its like to pick up the telephone to phone them to share a 'proud Mom moment' or share the latest news, only to realize the phone doesn't make calls to heaven. I truly believe your Dad is watching over you and your family and beaming with pride at all of you. You have such a fantastic family and I love when you share a bit of them with us. Please take this *Hug* as you celebrate your Dad's birthday!
A big hug to you. I know how you feel. I was very close to my dad and I miss him everyday too, I like to think they're always with us...
Hugs Vera! I lost my dad when I was 11 and didn't accept it for a long time. But I look back on the memories that I had with him fondly and I am so happy that you do the same thing. You never stop missing those you've lost, and that's OK!
Sending you a big hug, Vera! I know your Dad is watching over you and is very proud of his kind, thoughtful girl.
Sending Hugs to you Vera. Thinking of you across the miles.
I'm so sorry about your dad. Happy birthday to him. I'm sure he is proud of you and is watching you from Heaven. Hugs!
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